| Feb. 3rd, 2009 @ 11:54 am Getting to Korea, a tale of woe |
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So everyone is asking about Korea and when I will arrive. This is the deal.
I got accepted into the EPIK program in mid-December, so I thought, okay, I have two months to get a visa and a plane ticket; no problem.
I needed:
Diploma with apostille (WTF is that, you ask? I'll fill you in.)
Criminal background check with apostille
Two copies of transcripts
Proof of full time teaching experience
Two letters of recommendation, one from a former employer, one from a professor (Again WTF? I haven't been in school for two years and most of my teachers have retired.)
A personal essay about why I want to teach in Korea (Really?! Am I in the sixth grade now?)
A personal medical evaluation (Dear Korea, I'm still breathing, Love, Me)
Plus all the normal stuff like copy of passport, proof of citizenship, etc.
So first I had to find out what the hell an apostille is. No one seems to know, but apparently in order to acquire one, the document you want an apostille for has to be notarized by a notary public. So I order my online criminal background check and take that and my diploma to a notary public and she asks me what she wants me to do with it. I tell her that I want them notarized. She says that she notarizes signatures and there's nothing for me to sign. I agree and ask if she knows what an apostille is. She doesn't (and she really should). So I went home and called the state police and ask about notarizing a Criminal background check and they tell me that they can do it, but they can't do it for online CBCs, and I have to re-order through snail mail (And consequently pay for it again) and they will notarize it there.
Then Christmas happened. Apparently every government agency in the United States is closed from December 19th through January 4th. So I had to wait.
I also called the university to get a notarized diploma. They tell me that they don't know anything about it and to call after Christmas when the notary comes back from vacation.
So I waited, had a lovely Christmas, and started to mildly panic about getting everything done on time. After all, I have to gather all this crap, ship it to Korea, wait for the Korean government to approve my visa, mail it back to me so I can ship my passport and and visa application to D.C. and they can approve it and mail it back in time for me to be in Korea on the 19th of February. (Guess what isn't going to happen?) I also started looking for new jobs as this was taking a lot longer than I expected.
So finally I can call the university about notarizing my diploma. I get hold of the notary. She's clearly has no idea what she's talking about and insists that I have to be physically present for her to notarize anything. Keep in mind that this is in Indiana, 500 K away from where I am in Pennsylvania. . So I think Screw it, I'm going to go Indiana and take care of this myself. And have a lovely visit with my friend Barbara while I'm there.
I was less enthused when I woke up to half a meter of snow on the day of my planned departure.
Now, if it was something that I really wanted to do, a foot and a half of snow wouldn't have kept me away, but really? I wasn't feeling it at that point. I started to apply for jobs in Germany. (Apparently I'm not going to get one, because I haven't heard from them)
So a week later, I made new arrangements with Barbara for overnight accommodations, drove to Indiana, had a fun evening watching Barbara teach her new, uber-specialized GED/ABE ESL ASL class in Indianapolis and I drove up to Muncie the next morning.
I looked up the office for the Notary public online and I hied my self to the library. They have no idea what I'm talking about when I tell them that I wanted my diploma notarized, nor do they remember talking to me. So they called the Alumni center, where I originally called and I got hold of the moron who told me that I had to come to Indiana in the first place. Apparently there are two NP on campus. Who knew? So I drive over to the alumni center, and meet with this ditzy woman who is also a notary public, but also has no idea why I need my diploma notarized, nor does she know what an apostille is (And again, she really should). So after wasting a lot of time there, she finally decides that she needs to call the diploma office. Apparently, there is not one, not two, but three Notary Publics on campus. Why doesn't one university need three NP's? One's who apparently know nothing about each other. Three people who are being paid by the tax dollars of Indiana's citizens to not know what the hell is going on? I'm really not sure. So the diploma office tells her that yes, indeed, she can notarize my diploma. And went on to explain how to do it.
My lovely gold embossed double Master of Arts diploma that I spent seven and a half years of blood sweat and tears to earn now has a big stamp on it and typing that basically says,"yes, indeed it is real."
Now fortunately the diploma office NP is the only non-idiot in the state of Indiana (excluding Barbara, of course) because he or she also knows what an apostille is and how to get one. So she gives directions to ditzy NP and I am informed that I need to go to the County Courthouse and to the Department of State to get it.
So ditz tells me to go to the only big building in town. I can't miss it.
Guess how many big buildings there are in Muncie? Not very many, but enough to miss. So I went to the City Courthouse and they managed to correctly direct me to the County Courthouse where I proceed to find the Department of State office.
They don't know what an apostille is either. *headdesk*
So I described what little I deciphered about apostilles and they realize what it is I'm looking for. Apparently it's a piece of paper that states that "yes, indeed, the notary public really is a notary public." At this point I wanted to cry.
So one apostille down, one more to go.
Mind, I haven't actually received my CBC in the mail yet, despite it being long overdue.
But anyway, I went back to Barbara's house. We ate burritos, discussed academia and the relative merits of man on man pr0n (her son recently took her to a rather raunchy drag show.), went to see "Bride Wars" and I headed for home. I'm sure that anyone listening in on our conversation was either terrified or intrigued. After all the sound in Chipotle does seem to carry.
So the reason that I hadn't received the CBC is because our mail keeps being delivered to the neighbor. Now, a normal neighbor would take the mail out of their mailbox and put it into ours, or perhaps even better, actually deliver it do our door. They put our mail back into their mailbox on the off chance that we're mind readers and can figure them out.
A brief aside about our neighbors. I have never seen them. Ever. My parents have been in this house since I was in high school in 1996 and they lived in their house longer. I've never seen a car in their driveway. Nothing. Now, we don't live that close; my parents' house in the sticks after all, so it isn't like they're right next door or anything, but you'd think that I'd catch a glimpse in the twelve years we've been around. Also, these are real and true rednecks. I thought my family was bad, but really, they have a toilet in their yard with flowers growing in it (ha, ha, potted plants. Hmm). They ripped their swimming pool out, but left the mess behind and the weeds grow up. I'm pretty sure they have a rusted car up on blocks in the back yard. I don't usually make much of a fuss about the neighbors, because, frankly, I don't care, but they're a little creepy.
So anyway, my father checked their mailbox (apparently this is an ongoing problem that I was not privy to) and found my CBC (and also his paycheck, which is probably why he checked in the first place). I sent it off to get my Pennsylvania apostille (note that all of the previous mess could have been handled by mail if someone knew what their job entailed). The only downside of the PA apostille process is that I had to pay for it. I guess the adage, "You get what you pay" has been proven in this instance. The apostille was also delivered to the neighbors, so I got it late as well.
So finally I got everything together on the 26th of January and shipped it off with warm and tender thoughts to Korea where it is now waiting to be processed for a visa.
And apparently, so many other people were having the same kinds of problems that they added a second orientation date on March 26th. So it looks as if that's the date I'm shooting for.
Now you all know my tale of frustration and woe and why none of you were aware of my arrival date in Korea. I won't even get into the letters of recommendation, proof of teaching and essay, because, comparatively, not that exciting. So my advice for anyone considering teaching abroad? Go to Taiwan. |
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